Bringing Up Bebe

Bringing Up Bebe

As an American parent I've seen two dominant parenting styles.
One that I see practiced by the more affluent is preparing your kid to
compete literally while he or she is in diapers. It's the Baby
Einstein thing, primary school kids with lessons and clubs crowding
out any moment of freedom...you get the idea. Another is where kids
are left to their own devices in front of the tv and xbox. When I saw
Pamela Druckerman's Bringing Up Bebe: One American Mother Discovers
the Wisdom of French Parenting I was curious to find out what she had
learned.
After being fired from her Wall Street Journal job, Druckerman
made a more abrupt transition than most people would have under the
circumstances: entering into a relationship and moving to Paris.
Marriage and pregnancy happened in due course. As a new parent, she
discovered herself out of sync with her Parisian peers. Their babies
did their nights (slept through the night) when they were only a few
months old. Their toddlers showed a dearth of tantrums and whining
and ate a wide variety of adult foods rather than subsisting on
macaroni and cheese and chicken nuggets. Their preschoolers were
polite and focussed. What were those moms doing and how could she
learn their skills? Fortunately for us, she researched this subject
extensively and condensed her discoveries into a fascinating and
enjoyable book.
Food is a great example of the differences. When French
children are old enough to handle solid food they are exposed to a
wide variety, beginning with pureed fruits and veggies rather than the
ubiquitous rice cereal they would been served in Les Etats Unis. If
they do not take to a particular food after only a few times it isn't
removed from their menu. At an early age they eat multi course meals
en famille (with family). And their meal schedule consists of three
meals and one snack, not the constant fridge raiding we're used to on
this side of the Atlantic.
I like the emphasis on children being alert and engaged with
space to play and explore and even be bored. It isn't that they're
neglected. It's that they are given the chance to learn through
discovery rather than constant competitive instruction. It's how they
can find out their own interests and passions and be intrinsically
motivated. What a concept!
If you are a parent or parent to be and want to discover an
alternative to the current dominant American parenting styles,
Bringing Up Bebe is a must read.
On a personal note, dear little Joey cat had to see the vet. He is
super allergic to fleas. He had to have medicines. I'm engaged in an
all out flea seek and destroy mission. The visit wiped out my lap top
fund and a big chunk of my emergency fund. So every cent will go into
emergency fund. Literally. But Joey cat is worth it. :)
A great big shout out goes out to Joey cat and all creatures great and
small who are our devoted companions.
Julia Emily Hathaway



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